Wednesday, June 27, 2007

I missed my quota today

I did not install any posts for the trampoline retaining wall today. Instead, I lay curled up in a ball on my bed with intestinal distress from eating at the all-you-can-eat Pizza Hut dinner buffet (where kids eat free with a paying adult). I'd blog about that, except Ellie has already blogged about a similar thing today, quite coincidentally.

It was interesting to see how she referred to her condition by her boyfriend's nickname, though. Honestly, I've always thought "The Locksmith" was a better nickname for him, but that's the trouble with genius. It is rarely recognized. Except I note he has taken to calling himself that in her comments section. He must be an exceptionally bright fellow and not at all like the previous one.

Two days ago, a lady I work with walked into my cube, sat down, and asked, "What is rum?" She must have been pretty bored, as it's kind of easy to figure out what rum is from the web. As luck would have it, I managed to deliver quite a dissertation on the various varieties of spirits. I summed it up with, "One thing you quickly discover when you look into the different kinds of liquor is that across the entire world, relatively independently of one another, man in virtually every society has figured out how to make liquor out of whatever grows there. It's some kind of primal drive." I stopped short of discussing the parallels between the quest for liquor and the quest for god and the joys and destruction wrought by both because, of course, liquor is real, rendering the discussion one of those sophomoric exercises you go through when it's late at night and there's nothing left in the bar but fat chicks and the drunk dude next to you.

Yeah. You know what I'm talking about.

Rhonda got tagged by one of those annoying chain-letter-blog things, and I actually ended up spending valuable brain cells thinking of seven "random" facts about myself. Not because I thought I'd get tagged, but because it was stuck in my head like the way "I Love Rock'n'Roll" was after that bachelorette party sang it at Lucky Joe's a couple weeks ago. Now, having thought about it, I can never actually answer the question as the answers would no longer be random. I had a few good ones. I tried one of my favorite ones out on Manly Lesbian, and she responded with, "Yuk. How about you sing weird stuff in the shower."

See above comment about genius.

7 comments:

Nava said...

So, what was that favorite one of yours?

CherkyB said...

It was not my very favorite one, as I'd hate to waste that on an IM conversation with my mother-in-law when I could make bank on it here. But I thought it was one of the better ones.

"I own over 1000 rounds of ammunition for a gun I have never fired."

ellie said...

Well, there are many D_ s in the family, including self, so the big D__ could be any of them.

Did you s*&% your pants?

D__ seems OK with the Locksmith. He probably prefers that as online identity over, let's say, "my sweetheart."

Aargh.

Fat manly lesbian moother in law said...

Well, what are the other 6?

wife said...

How about "I can't eat out more than 3 minutes from home."
Poor CherkyB.

Rhonda said...

1000 rounds?! Holy cow! What are you waiting for the apocalypse?!

wife said...

No, he used up his stock of bags of sugar years ago.