Saturday, October 03, 2009

The Creeping Death

Yes, folks, the mighty CherkyB has been struck down in his prime. Well, not so much in his prime, given that the moment he turned 40, his whole body went right to hell. Except his looks. He still has his good looks. By "prime" we'll use the definition that womens use: he's making a lot more money than he spends on medical bills.

On Thursday, I came down with the flu. I hadn't intended to come down with the flu, but there it is. I have spent the last 50 hours in bed, relegated to the basement guest room so as to not infect the rest of the fambly. I only get out of bed to use the terlet or to take a shower or to fill up the giant suck-bottle with water.

During this time, I've had plenty of quiet reflection time, and here are some of the little gems that have resulted from that:
  • No matter what it feels like, sinus congestion is very unlikely to actually pop your eyeballs out of their sockets. And no, that liquid streaming out of the corners isn't the jelly from inside.
  • Be careful what you watch before retiring to a night of feverish restlessness. For instance, watching a bunch of video reviews for the Sprint HTC Hero might make it so that you spend your entire night swiping your finger back and forth across its screen in an hallucination that seems so real you are, by morning, not only completely convinced that the Sprint HTC Hero is more responsive than the European version, but that Sprint might actually be a viable mobile phone service provider. That's your clue that it's just a hallucination.
  • Writing down when you took your medicine helps you keep track of when you can take it again.
  • Not writing down when you took your medicine means you can take more as soon as you start to feel crappy again. This is an altogether substantially more satisfying method.
  • It's important to avoid medicines, like acetaminophen, that will destroy your liver if you take too much of it if you're going with plan B up there.
  • It's nice to have a dog. A dog will lie down and nap next to you no matter how sick you are and when the rest of your fambly is avoiding you like the plague.
  • All in all, I appreciate the rest, but I would have enjoyed not being sick more. The lawn isn't going to mow itself.

6 comments:

fat moother said...

your momma.

ellie said...

is it swine?

Rhonda said...

Just had a conversation with my Aunt about how her dog was her best bud when she was really really sick too. Funny how you can cough and snot on 'em all you want and they just don't get sick.
Hope you feel better soon so the Mrs. doesn't have to look at an overgrown lawn. That's just wrong.

blogauthor said...

Flu sucks. My dependent beings had it last week. Unfortunately, neither of them could be banished to another sector of the house, so I was in the center of the action. Curiously, I didn't catch it, which leads me to conclude that I had it earlier in the year when I had all the same symptoms but it was chalked up to mono.

But enough about me.


Do you think Obama has gotten the flu?

paula said...

just checking in on ya..... making sure you had nothing to do with the weather ballon fiasco

blogauthor said...

Checking in for same reason as paula. :)