Sunday, July 19, 2009


I'll have a trip wrap-up written sometime before the next trip. In the mean time, you get a Certified True story to keep you entertained.

We arrived home safely at about 6pm yesterday after two weeks of travel. I had set the A/C to 85 degrees while we were gone, since nobody (not even pets) was in the house. Naturally, we had a heat wave, so when we got home all tired, the first floor of the house was 85 degrees, with the second floor (where all the bedrooms are) being 90. My A/C is marginal at best, so even with a judicious application of the whole house fan plus a reasonable cool-off once the sun went down, by the time bedtime rolled around, the upstairs had cooled to 80.

The decision was made to sleep in the basement, which was somewhere in the high 60's, I think, in terms of temperature. HannahC had a head cold, and the gain in elevation had caused her quite a bit of suffering, so she crashed out on the couch in the basement. MaxieC slept on a cushion that was occupying the space where the guinea pigs would normally have been. The Mrs. and I got the spare room.

The Mrs. decided to screw around for a while on the compooter, as she was starved for it. I had brought my laptop along, and thus I had a half hour of internet when we were at hotels, and on occasion had some at my parents' or Ellie's, so I wasn't jonesing as badly as she was.

I hit the sack.

At some point, I released some excess methane pressure that had been building up inside. I went right back to sleep.

About 20 minutes later, The Mrs. came to bed. When she lifted the covers, she exclaimed, "Oh geeze!" and then stumbled out of bed to turn on the big giant fan we have down there (required for when her hillbilly brother visits, as he's used to sleeping outdoors). And then the stank hit me. I misdirected:
Me, CherkyB: "Did you fart?"

The Mrs.: "No. You did."

Me, CherkyB: "I don't think it could have been me. I don't think anything could make that kind of a stink and still be alive. That smells like death."
And it did, too.


Rhonda said...

I like the transition from SoS to Smooth.
Welcome Home Cherky family!!!

ellie323 said...

good way to get the bed to yourself! mcdonaldse

Anonymous said...

It was caused by a Ted's withdrawal or incorrectly stored cigar smoke. McDonalds would have exited everything making a change in sheets necessary.

blogauthor said...

LOLoudly! No matter how old I get, farts are funny. My husband says I'm juvenile. My son is happy I am juvenile. You and Offspring could perhaps have a contest someday ... He'd be fierce competition!

Manly Lesbian said...

I think farts are hysterical -especially when they are mine. pull my finger....