Jou got to choot jour gunz maign

Yes, I have used an old quote from the cousin of a feller who was arrested about two years back for killing someone with a bullet that fell from the sky after he and a bunch of his buddies decided to celebrate New Years by firing off about 40 rounds into the air. Tragic event, really. And an opportunity to trot out that old wives' tale about how a bullet shot into the sky lands at the same velocity that it left the gun. No, it doesn't. I leave the Newtonian physics to the reader, but I will note that, unlike when you were a freshman, this problem does not contain the phrase "in a vacuum" anywhere.

But ever since they splashed that soundbite all over the radio for a week, everyone 'round these parts has managed to latch on to it. As in:

Me, CherkyB: "Hey. I'm going to the gun range tomorrow. You wanna go?"

Friend: "Oh yeah? Jou got to choot jour guns, maign?"

Me, CherkyB: "I got to choot my guns."

Friend: "Yeah, jou got to choot jour guns."

Years later, the details of the case are fuzzy, but the soundbite lives on.

OK, mostly because of me.

I did finally manage to get to the gun range on Friday. This is the first time I have chot any of my guns for over two years. It's sad. And, even sadder, I still didn't get to choot my shotgun cuz we only had two hours. I got to choot all the pistolas, though.

Plus, I got to choot four of someone else's guns. That's always fun. I'd like to just say, for the record, that I'm going to add the S&W scandium/titanium .44 magnum to the list of guns I don't really enjoy chooting all that much. Or standing one lane over from when someone else is chooting it, given its ability to throw hot gasses and particles six feet sideways, where they burn the arm of the person in the lane next to you.

I did, though, manage to set up to the left of my buddy, so I got to land hot shell casings on him from my USP .40C as payback. That'll teach him

Now, funny story here. The gun range I belong to is waaay out in ranch country, and on a Friday afternoon it is largely deserted. Plus, not much is labeled. We took up residence on the 25 yard pistol range, and I set up a 17"x22" target area. (That's a 2x2 grid of 8.5"x11" paper targets from Midway USA, for those of you trying to figure out the dimensions.)

And then I proceeded to miss the targets completely with about half the shots. "Well, I haven't shot in over two years, so I'm a bit rusty." I improved a bit during the session, but not to how well I used to be able to shoot at 25 yds. But, you know, that was always indoors, and this was outdoors (though calm and sunny), and I used to shoot a lot more often than I do now. Like once a month as opposed to the once every couple years now.

It wasn't until I was relaying the story to a different co-worker, who has been a member of that gun range a lot longer than I (and has been there more than three times), that I discovered this wasn't the 25 yd range. He swore up and down that it was a 50 yd range. So we fired up Google maps and measured on the satellite view, and from that it appears to actually be a 50 meter range when measured vs. the scale on the map. It is also 1/4 the length of the 200 yard range, which is also advertised as being 200 meters, depending on which sign and/or web page you consult. All I can say is that things look smaller when you're out on the plains than they do indoors.

Oh, and I can never set foot in California again, as I fired off quite a number of rounds in his new SIG AR-15 and enjoyed it quite a bit. I declined to let him shoot the tracer-rounds, though, as the berms were completely covered with dried grass and tumbleweeds.

Yeah, that's right. I'm the one with the good judgment.