Monday, July 09, 2007

MaxieC, Master of the English Language

My dear parents will be visiting us starting in roughly two weeks. That means we have to start putting things in place now to make it look like we're not terrible parents. The first thing we need to do is break The Childrens of their habits of saying "shut up" and "idiot" all the time. Habits The Mrs. today accused me of teaching them when she said, "I never say those words."

Which is a filthy lie, but there's no point in trying to argue it. If there's one key to a happy marriage, it's that the Man is always the one at fault.

So at the dinner table, MaxieC blurted out "idiot!" for no apparent reason, and The Mrs. took action:
The Mrs.: "MaxieC, if I hear you..."

MaxieC: "Idiot!"

The Mrs.: "...say idiot..."

MaxieC: "Idiot!"

The Mrs.: " more time..."

MaxieC: "Iiiidiiii-ot!"

The Mrs.: "'ll be naughty corner. Starting now!"

MaxieC: "Idi-shit!"
This may take some work.


Maybelle LaTouche said...

Shudda nipped it in the bud. Prolly too late now.

Nava said...

MaxieC's blog would have been rated higher than yours on the PG ladder, I think. Hey, and I've just become PG-13!!

Good luck with educating MaxieC. Might be easier to hire another kid for your parents' visit

ellie said...

Good luck with that. Might I suggest also saying, "When you call me that, it hurts my feelings." That might work, especially with Hannah.

Lillian Noseybody said...

NAH - Hannah would just give you a raspberry. I like Nava's idea of getting a Max look a like to replace him during the visit. Or you could hide him in the attic and feed him bread and water! Or you could send him to military school.

Rhonda said...

No suggestions.
I have the potty mouth in the house.
The kids rebelled against me.

Have you seen the Will F. video with his daughter Pearl?
She's got a potty mouth too.

ellie said...

Another suggestion would be to challenge the children to come up with creative euphemisms for idiot, stuff that would be over most people's heads. Given my own potty mouth combined with my lack of parenting experience, those are the only suggestions I have.

As the Dalai Lama said, "Kindness is my only religion."

fat moother said...

developmentally brain disabled? Gray matter impaired? intellectually handicapped?

CherkyB said...


ellie said...

The Will Farrell video is awesome!

Nava said...

Incredible video, Rhonda!!

CherkyB, I hope you do not burst into tears like Will Farrell.

flash said...

when i was little i said f*%#ing a*#hole in front of my grandmother. i remember that i very much enjoyed watching everyone's response!