Tuesday, August 19, 2008

A collection of that which should have been

I've been slacking on the old blarg lately, and it's not from lack of material. It's actually because I realized that it had been a year since my favorite blog, Badgers, came to an abrupt halt, and I've been stewing in self-pity. And we're coming on fast on the 1-year anniversary of the death of The JohnnyB (the blog, not the person, as far as I know). August is, apparently, a rough month for bloggers.

So I'm going to throw together a big, nasty jumble of all the things I should have been blogging about but wasn't. It'll be like the Reader's Digest of blogging, only with less substance.

Yes, a tall order is that one.

First, I'll open with a moovie review. I don't normally do "Night at the Moovies with CherkyB," mainly cuz moovie reviews is one of those areas that Cavitation has kind of claimed for himself (though I think this was prior to him having to flee the country), and I try not to cop the style of other bloggers. Though, certainly, that courtesy is rarely returned. But here I just have to break the rules a bit and do it.

Like prom night all over again, as they say.

Last week The Mrs. and I watched one of the most godawful moovies I have ever seen. I know what you're thinking, "Did they get sneak-preview tickets to the latest abomination upon the Star Wars name? Or...oh look...blue...pretty....mmmmmmm. I like Santa."

No, as you my loyal, though easily distracted, readers know, The Mrs. and I never ever ever under any circumstances ever go to a moovie in the moovie theater without The Childrens. Rather, we get all of our moovie enjoying pleasure from Netflix. And yes, we did watch Memoirs of a Geisha this past weekend, though no, that wasn't the moovie of which I speak, this despite the fact that it was purportedly a story of a high-class escort girl yet contained absolutely no T-T's in it.

I am, in fact, referring to "National Lampoon's Pledge This!" Aghast, you are. Again, I know what you're thinking, which is because after all these years, I have my finger directly on the pulse of my readership, ready to apply sleeper-hold pressure just as soon as it becomes necessary. You are thinking, "But wait. How could a moovie chock full of frontal nudity and starring Paris Hilton be bad? I mean, she seemed like a great actress in all the clips I downloaded of her off the web. Oh, did I say that out loud? No. I didn't. Wait - so why am I reading it in this blog post. It's like, like, I'm reading my own mind. Wow. Deep. Obama!"

Yeah, I honestly was surprised myself. But it actually started out bad, as the very first scene when Paris speaks, her lips don't match the dialog. So, if you're thinking of checking out Paris in her Hollywood debut, skip it.

Next topic. Painting. I am apparently an absolutely atrocious painting instructor. I can't say any more without potentially having to suffer through another round of weeping.

Next topic. We are the kiss of death to restaurants. We've been regularly dropping The Childrens off at Kid's Night Out at the Discovery Museum, which gives us three hours child-free on a Friday night about once a month. We've gone through four of these thus far. The first one, we went to a famous local restaurant in Old Town (which is what you call a downtown if there aren't any high-rises, and instead it is just old) that had been there for years, and the food wasn't all that good. Two weeks later, they were out of business. Then we went to our "favorite" sushi place in Old Town the next time, then to a chop house near there the time after, both without incident. The food was good both times.

Friday, we went to a French restaurant in the newer part of town that had opened about a year ago and was run by a couple who had for many years run a very successful French restaurant in a smaller town a bit south of here. I had the "game fusion," which was Australian red deer and kangaroo. It was OK. The Mrs. was not that impressed with her meal.

Sunday morning, I open up the paper, and it says, "[Restaurant] Abruptly Closes." We were there, from what I can tell, on the last night they were open.

Then this morning, we are discussing where to go for dinner tonight. The Mrs. and HannahC had to be at a homeschool Odyssey of the Mind kickoff meeting clear across town until 7, so we decided to eat out after that. The Mrs. said she had coupons for free kids meals at Red Robin and at Bear Creek Cafe. I opened up the morning paper about 15 minute later, and it says, "Bear Creek Cafe Closes."

So we had Red Robin, which I hate.

And The Mrs. forgot the coupons. So now we'll have to eat there again. Blugh.

Next topic: pond electricity. The replacement of the pond electrical box did not go as smoothly as I had hoped. The new box was defective and had one of the screw holes only drilled out halfway, which one does not find out until one completes putting a stake into the ground, attaching the box, doing all the wiring, and then inserts a screw to attach the outlets to the box, and it promptly bottoms out and snaps off. Luckily, I was able to remove that screw and replace it with a shorter one. Not so lucky when I snapped off the screw next to it because that hole wasn't quite deep enough, either. That screw I couldn't get out. So I will take this as an opportunity to buy a set of easy outs. Right now, the box is held together with 3 rather than 4 screws. It'll be fine for a while.

I haven't caught a fish in weeks. I'll try again tomorrow.


ellie said...

One of the best posts I've read in a while. Maybe its time to rewatch superbad.

Anonymous said...

Hey, I'm sorry to be a jerk commenting off-topic, but I wanted to email you about your in-ground trampoline! Basically, I had a simple question. How does an in-ground trampoline not fill up with water? I've been going over your design, and am ready to do it (we're buying a house right now and negotiated for them to sell us their trampoline largely after reading your post), but then my wife asked me about water filling up inside the hole, and I had no clue.

My email address is:

scunning at gmail dot com

Thanks! If you could reply, that would be awesome.

Nava said...

A painting instructor???